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People are attracted to what is familiar. What is familiar is not always healthy. If you find yourself in repetitive cycles with the people in your life, and don’t know how to do things differently, a therapeutic relationship can help.
Therapy is a time set aside just for you for 50 minutes weekly in which the focus is entirely on you, your needs and sometimes needing to sort out what those needs actually may be. As important as the significant people in our lives are, people have opinions that come from a personal place. It is difficult to always separate “advice” from the “advice giver’s” perspective and their own needs. Therapy is not about being given advice. It is not about the therapist being judge or jury. It is not about the need for the therapist to have you do something in a way that makes the therapist happy or feel good. It is about being helped to unfold what you already know, your truth, not mine, and to allow what you know, need, and want to begin to emerge from underneath all the outside noise and influences.
Not all couples come into counseling because of a crisis in their relationship. Many clients that I see describe a parallel functioning to their relationship- almost like 2 ships sailing on parallel paths but not really every connecting. There are few things more painful that being lonely when you are not alone but with a significant other. Therapy can help to address that and to give you the skills and understanding to make changes in your relationship.
When your relationship is in crisis for many different reasons- infidelity, emotional abuse, one or both of you wanting to explore divorce, it is critical to work with a trained professional who can help you make decisions not just based on feelings and emotions. It is not the therapist job to decide if you should or should not stay married. But with many years of experience, Life Transitions Counseling can help you peel off the layers of hurt, disappointment, resentment and mistrust, and make decisions about the future of your relationship and the way to best handle what comes after that decision.
Change is usually hard and can be scary and overwhelming. If you find yourself flooded by all the new beginnings as well as the loss that accompanies divorce, you could benefit from the help of a caring, trusted therapeutic relationship. A good therapist can help you navigate the minefields of “uncoupling” and help to normalize and stabilize the pressure cooker of feelings you are experiencing with complete confidentiality and without having to worry about being judged. Therapy can also help you to adjust to your new normal once the divorce is over and life looks very different from what you are used to it looking and feeling like. To read more about the value of Divorce Process Therapy, please go to our Divorce Process Therapy page
Finding a confidential network of likeminded people all of whom are going through similar yet unique circumstances, can help to give support and understanding to us. For some people, hearing others share their reality gives their own reality perspective and clarity. I offer groups for people going through divorce and right now for Mothers of teenage daughters whom are navigating developmental issues that are a normal part of parenting and of being a teenager.